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Talking to ourselves in a discouraging negative way affects not only how we perceive the world but also how we pursue our goals.

We can literally talk ourselves out of our dreams and goals unconsciously by talking to ourselves in a mean way.

Sometimes we all talk to ourselves in a hindering manner.

Even Rachel Hollis, bestselling author of the book girl wash your face admitted in an interview that sometimes she has to tweak on the way she talks to herself.

It’s a conscious thought work she is doing to put herself into another state of mind whenever she catches herself thinking negative thoughts about the situations she is in.

In this post, I share with you 5 tips you can implement to stop negative self-talk right away.


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  • Count your blessings
  • Be a high performer
  • Avoid triggering situations
  • Care for yourself
  • Practice self-love


Whenever you catch yourself talking to yourself in a mean, unhelpful way you can start counting your blessings instead.

Switch your focus from the things you dislike about your life and about yourself to the things you are proud of and grateful for.

Use this 5-minute journal or a simple notebook and jot down all the things you’re proud of in yourself and grateful for in your life.

Do it for 6 months every day and I bet it’ll have a positive effect on your life.

You can make this practice part of your regular morning ritual or evening routine.


Instead of spinning your wheels, constantly being busy and still not arriving anywhere switch your focus to your goals and focus on your results each and every single day instead.

You can use for example this planner to start your days with intention and evaluate each evening how you were doing in terms of getting the results you planned to.

I’ve written a review on the high-performance planner which I’m currently using as part of my morning and evening routine.

When you are committed to producing results every day and do the work the negative self-talk can diminish over time by itself.

Instead, you’ll have every day produced something you can be grateful for and proud of.


Which are the situations you tend to talk to yourself in a negative way?

Is it while you’re scrolling through your Instagram feed and start comparing your life to someone else?

Or when you watch what successful entrepreneurs in your field are up to and start comparing your beginning to someone else’s middle?

Notice the situations you feel most triggered and avoid those.

While you can work on yourself by coaching yourself out of your problems or find someone helping you clear the stuff that’s coming up you can also just simply avoid those triggering situations and focus on your dreams, goals, and results instead.


Self-care is a crucial part of health and well-being.

In fact also in terms of living a happy, fulfilling life and creating a successful online business.

While there are some entrepreneurs burning their candles at both ends at the same time – this strategy won’t work forever.

It’s better to make room for self-care right away.

Reaching your goals in your life or creating your business should never come to the cost of abusing your body and sacrificing your health and well-being.

Whether you make self-care as part of your daily routine or plan weekly dates with yourself it’s up to you.

You can check out how to practice self-care in 14 different ways and these 13 self-care ideas to get inspired.


Besides practicing self-care it’s so important to practice self-love as well.

While self-care means to care for your body, mind, and soul, self-love means to love yourself just the way you are without excuses.

Self-love is more about connecting with your inner self and more of a mindset thing.

Meditation is a wonderful way to connect with your inner self.

I have a free introduction to meditation here.

Also, feel free to read the post I’ve written on self-love where you learn 4 different ways you can practice self-love.

All books or tools I mentioned in this post at a glance:

  • Girl wash your face is the number one bestselling book written by motivational speaker Rachel Hollis.
  • The 5-minute journal is the gratitude journal you can use as part of your morning or evening routine to remind yourself what you are thankful for each and every day.
  • This plain dotted notebook is what you can use as your bullet journal.
  • The high-performance planner is the planner you can use as part of your morning and evening routine to create a more intentional, productive life and business.

You might be also interested in How to realize your dreams and how to create your best life.